Six months with my Switch

Six months ago I started the third of March in a slow moving queue of fellow geeks, waiting impatiently for the Game store in Belfast to hand us our new babies. Once home I opened that box with the finesse of those antique loving folks on the telly. I looked at each part in child like awe, still amazed at how tiny it all was. So tiny. Then came Zelda and more wide-mouthed gawping at this new born loveliness. Cut to today and my little Switch is six months old. They grow up so fast.

Seems like a good time to review the box's life so far, especially since it's fast approaching it's first Christmas which will be a really interesting time. It no longer seems to be a question of will people buy the Switch but more can Nintendo make enough to meet demand. In Belfast here I think you can still walk in to a shop and buy one but the UK has never been filled with Nintendo lovers. In Japan it's a different story, with literal queues of 3000 people waiting for a raffle ticket which lets them 'win' the ability to buy the thing. What-in-the-name-of-f***

So it's a success then! Nintendo are back after the colossal failure that was the Wii U. I loved my Wii U too, I defended it blindly and enjoyed my time with it but Nintendo has lessons to learn from it and learn them they did. The hardware itself is sleeker, smaller and more in line with rival tech as opposed to Fisher Price toys. The OS is snappier and leaner than any console I've played. The speed with which you can boot it up from sleep mode and be playing a game is both insane and glorious. It makes my PS4 look like a geriatric climbing stairs.

This is all stuff I could have said six months ago though. The difference since then is the games. Zelda Breath of the Wild is currently my favourite game in all of time. I racked up 70 hours in three weeks (for comparison, despite loving Horizon it took me six weeks to finish on 50 hours) DLC is coming before the years out and that'll probably be better than most full games. There was a bit of  a lull after Zelda which I filled with Snake Pass and Mr Shifty but I was still yearning for more.

Mario kart 8 Deluxe hit at the end of April and although it was port of the Wii U game I still jumped in and fell in love all over again. The game was mostly the same but the console makes the difference. Four player on the Wii U consisted of handing out a gamepad, pro controller, Wii remotes and maybe a nunchuk or steering wheel. A cluster of nonsense. Switch? Four joy-cons. Tiny, neat and simple. As strange as it makes me, I love my Switch for being so tidy and neat. Other thing I couldn't (be bothered) doing with the Wii U version; playing against my mum! Took that Switch up home, plonked it on a kitchen table and tried not to laugh to much as she finished in 11th. Beaut.

The summer is when it really clicked in to gear. ARMS launched in June and took the mantle of only fighting game I don't completely suck at. Not that I'm good at it either but I always have fun. Even my wife managed to hold her own and kick my arse occasionally. A mere five weeks after that Splatoon 2 released and pretty much consumed my life for the next month. I'm still only halfway through the single player and I've barely scratched Ranked mode because the Turf War so is so blooming addictive. Its fast, vibrant and unlike anything else out there. Apart from Splatoon 1.


I need to play more of it and I need to go back and play more ARMS. Which makes it really daft that I just bought Mario and Rabbids. Too early in to say much about it but it's off to a good start. In three weeks time I'll be buying SteamWorld Dig 2 and at some unspecified date I'll be needing Stardew Valley. Then Super Mario odyssey comes out on the 27th October and oh dear god there's not enough time to play all the damn games. To solve this dilemma I've had to start bringing it to work so I can play on my lunch.

Until now I've been pretty precious about carrying it about to much but then that's really one of the best features. There was one day back in March when I watched some colleagues play Snipperclips and laugh away at that quirky oddity. The Switch has been on two train journeys, both times used for multiplayer hijinks and each time impressing whoever got a go. I even braved it getting it out in a pub one time. I'm such a bad parent.

Most of the time though it's been kept safe at a home. Either I'm saving Hyrule on the TV or I'm losing at Splatoon in handheld because I'm secretly trying to follow the wife's Greys Anatomy marathon at the same time. Either way, I really love that tiny wonder. So tiny.

the Spider-Man Homecoming review

There's a new Spider-Man film out and for the first time the screen version of that character shares a universe with Iron Man and the Avengers etc You already know that and you know you're going to see it... Which makes this review completely pointless. But hey, I like to tap a keyboard when I'm excited.

Yes I've got that tingly post-film buzz and my cheekbones still hurt from grinning. This is a really fun film. It's also a sweet film, in a way that sets it apart form the other Marvel efforts. I like it when my superhero's are nice and I don't care what the rest of you DC fans say. The original Spider-Man 2 is still one of the best damn superhero films because it's all about his love for MJ. Well that and stopping a speeding train, a good film needs variety. 

Back to the new one..  This film is about a teenager with super-powers and a big heart. High school friends and crushes were enough to occupy most of us but here's a kid who just got home from fighting with the Avengers and wants to continue doing so. Peter is the ultimate fan-boy, geeky and in awe, but more than that he's the kid that wants to join the adults, to impress and to be treated like a man.  He also wants to do the right thing, to genuinely help everyone he can. And that means he turns down his friends, skips school stuff and can only stare longingly at the girl with no time to woo.

Tom Holland is superb here and conveys it all brilliantly. He goes from excitable puppy in the company of Stark, to nervous and shy kid at the party, he's the sweet and caring nephew of his Aunt May and he's the wise-cracking web-head we all know and love who will ruin the day of any wrong doer. He is my favourite Peter parker/Spider-Man. Not saying it's my favourite Spidey film, and I like what both Garfield and Maguire did, but this guy feels like the comic character on screen rather a version of him. He is a living Peter Parker.

It helps that he's actually young. For once we get a comic film picking teenage actors to play teenagers and predictably they're the best folk for the job. Peters best friend Ned provides some lovely comic relief and a more believable friendship than the Harry Osborn one of old. Other legacy characters get new takes and I'm not going to spoil them but they're new, they're different and I'm excited to see were they go.

I've loads to still talk about but I can't blog all day... Michael Keaton is brilliant as the Vulture, a bad guy who's not trying to take over the world but instead just raking in money by illegal means. His story is tied in smartly with the Marvel universe and it all leads some tense scenes pre- final fight.

You know Tony Starks in the film and he's as good as always. You know there's web slinging and wise cracks and all of the Spider-Man traits you'd expect. I really love the character. I love how a geeky kid puts on a suit and becomes this confident, quipping hero. I adore watching him move on screen, web slinging about in acrobatic fashion. There's no power more fun to watch than web slinging. No character as endearing or amusing as Peter Parker.  This film is fun. And tense, and sweet and action-packed. It's Spider-Man dammit. This review was pointless, let me know when you've seen it. We'll share a grin together.

Nostalgia Tripping

The Crash Bandicoot re-masters have just took this weeks number 1 spot in the game charts. They also managed to have the biggest single format launch of the year so far, beating the blooming brilliant Horizon. And if facts don't sway you then how about some anecdotal evidence? I know people in real life that bought it. Yeah not just twitter people, actual people...

The biggest shock and the one that'll get this blog to its point.. Crash Bandicoot is over 20 years old. My wife and two other ladies I know bought this package because they loved the game when they were younger. It was nostalgia for them. A chance to relive their youth without using 20 layers of make-up (I'm joking, don't kill me) Another lady I know told me that the PS1 was her first console. What in the actual fudgery... If ever a comment made me feel old.

PlayStation is now at a point were it can create nostalgia. It's something Nintendo have done for years and something I never really considered other game companies would do. Reminding people of their productive weekends in front video games and cashing in on those precious memories. Crash Bandicoot, it alarms me to say, was probably the first game for many people. Not Mario, or Duck Hunt but Crash Bandicoot. Or Wipeout.

Hell even I have some nostalgia for Wipeout. The futuristic visuals and the dance soundtrack combined to make the example that videogames were suddenly cool. So cool. And I played it every Saturday night at my local church youth club. All the coolness. Wipeout got re-mastered as well, and just a month a go it topped the charts. People want those old games again and only now have publishers caught on that we're willing to buy them. What will be interesting to watch though is what happens next. Do people really want a brand new Crash Bandicoot game? Or was it enough to get the old games with nicer visuals? I'd say the latter but I've been wrong plenty of times before.

Of course the real nostalgia kings are still Nintendo. If you need proof of that then you've oblivious to tech news in the last 12 months. Pokémon Go was last summers phenomenon, reuniting 30 year olds with another childhood favourite. The NES Mini was released in November, or so say the rumours because nobody could seem to find stock of them. Its successor the SNES mini has only just been announced and it's already sold out. Amazon have enforced a one per customer policy and there isn't an online retailer in the UK still taking orders. Nintendo can't make enough of them. And just to confirm, this is a tiny replica of a 25 year old console that plays 25 year old games. Its easy money for Nintendo.

So why is nostalgia doing so well? Are you thinking I'll come up with an answer? Did any of this blog suggest I'd have an intelligent thought in my head? Some other people like to say that it's all about the state of the world, that Brexit and Trump has made the nostalgia drug a bit more potent. Maybe we all want a bit more escapism. Others would say that the business men have just been clever, looked at a bunch of 30 years spending their life savings on avocados and thought 'we'll re-sell them their childhood.'


Could be loads of things. Could even be that the stuff we liked as kids is still really good, and unlike films or TV it's not easy to get old games. So they can resell them to us. Forever. But hey lets not fret about pocket money and we'll just be kids again, carefree and square-eyed from staring at pixels too long.

a slightly inept gamer playing ARMS

 

ARMS is the newest Switch release from the team behind Mario Kart 8. Their previous game is probably the only racing game I've bought in years, because it’s easily the most accessible racer and the best for having a multiplayer laugh. ARMS is their entry in a genre that I find completely inaccessible, the fighter...

Even Smash Bros, Nintendo's family friendly take on the punch-em-up is a game that I fooled myself in to thinking I could play only to then go online and get my ass kicked repeatedly.  At one point yesterday I had a similar reaction to ARMS, encountering three opponents in a row who were bound to be laughing at me as I took a beating and barely sneaked in a hit. This purchase was looking like a tortuous mistake.

Thankfully my luck improved and I came up against some folk as average as me. Or maybe I got a lot better, but I doubt it. It’s a game of boxing, all about dodging and swinging punches. Those punches happen to come from Mr Fantastic style extendable arms with a range of gloves that shock, burn freeze or just generally slap the fudge out of your opponent. The extendable arms set it apart from Wii Boxing, that game which turned into a farcical swinging of Wii-motes until someone tired first. With your rival usually kept at a distance you’ll find yourself constantly moving and trying to avoid attacks as much as getting your own hits in. That movement is why I like it and why I think I might be able to avoid embarrassment online.

Multiple matches went down to the wire and the feeling of claiming a win when I was one punch away from defeat is a beautiful thing. Some fights had me unloading fists in a flurried frenzy whilst others had me retreating from a stronger attacker, timing my punches and throws better in a battle of wits. Some fights had me doing a bit of both but no fight ever felt the same.

Then I played some local matches against my wife who just so happens to be the most competitive being I’ve ever known. What started as “ill play your new game if you make the dinner,” turned into about ten rounds across the various modes of victories, defeats and gnashed teeth. I was not immediately better than her. Even when I did win it felt close. She got punches in and cheered, I retaliated and she swore. It was all really good fun.

Apart from the standard fights there’s also versions of volleyball and basketball which change things up and provide more chuckles. The fighters all have unique traits but I haven’t picked a favourite yet because they’re all so well designed. Each character is like something from a Saturday morning cartoon and the games visuals are a colourful blast to the eyeballs. It’s a charmer and a looker.

All in all I’m really impressed so far. The point of this not-really-a-review though was to say that it’s an easy one to pick up and play, even if you’re normally rubbish at the likes of Street Fighter/Injustice. I’ll still get my face punched in repeatedly but I’ll be enjoying the flip out of it regardless. Unless my wife gets on a real winning streak, can’t be coping with that.

E3: the Nintendo show

Last E3 blog! And it’s a bit late as after Nintendo’s Spotlight I had to go outside to a place filled with people and air and that kind of weirdness. The benefit is that as I write about Nintendo now I may have seen their showcase twice…

It was ok. My first impressions were a lot higher but upon reflection it was an ok presentation with some brilliant elements. The opening segment was another one of those lifestyle trailers showing the young people doing sociable things like going to parties, playing football and spinning cars around a garage like some kind of Fast and the Furious fanboys. All very stylish but it also makes me wonder if I’m using my switch wrong. I took it on a train once but I’ve yet to get invited to a rooftop party with it. 

Dropping during that bit was our first new announcement, Rocket League. The indie football-with-cars game that every fan has been asking for since the switch got announced. It’s a multiplayer favourite and we want all the multiplayer games on the Switch. I’m happy to see it there but I also only own it on the PS4, am I going to buy it again?

Kirby and Yoshi both had new titles announced for 2018 which is pleasantly early for their franchises. Both are nice additions to the library but again I can’t guarantee I’ll be picking them up. The indie scene has been filling my 2d platforming needs (where’s SteamWorld Dig 2?!) and probably will until I get some more Donkey Kong in my veins. 

Xenoblade 2 got reconfirmed for 2017 and showed more of its battle system and story. It’s a JRPG and another game that’s just not for me. Can’t get in to that genre but I know plenty who do and I recognise that this is release is a big deal on Nintendo’s schedule. The question you may have now is what the flip does this blogger actually like and is he buying anything?

Metroid Prime 4. Ooh sweet saints of Nintendo. There wasn’t a single game I wanted more and when that logo started appearing… My jaw dropped, my arms went up in the air, there was some tingling in my underwear. The hype consumed me. Only problem was there was no blooming game shown at all, just a logo but still… We now know what Nintendo are doing with Metroid. We needed to now, it’s been 10 years since Prime 3. 

In a similar fashion we got told that a main Pokémon title is in the works for the Switch. An inevitable title really but after last week’s Pokémon direct showed another 3DS update there was a bit of an online tantrum. Well those fans now know it’s coming, just not when or what it’ll look like.

And that sums up Nintendo’s showcase really. They always said they were focusing on 2017 games but dropping in names for what’s coming after is what e3 is all about. to We also know what we’re getting this year and two of the biggest titles are getting their own separate slots at E3. ARMS and Splatoon 2 tournaments will show those off but I’ve already got the pre-ordered and they’ll occupy my summer. The Zelda DLC packs had also been purchased before this spotlight gave details on what I’d paid for. Its Zelda, I don’t need to know anything. Take my money. Those titles and a bunch of indies are a good first year for me, but there’s one more title that shifts it to greatness.

Super Mario Odyssey. Trailer of the show, my highlight of the whole thing and a grin inducing beauty. We all knew Mario would be jumping and exploring and we had seen in January that he can now throw his hat. Didn’t think that would lead to the hijinks we got in that trailer though… You can transform in to nearly all of the things. Goombas, bullet bills, tanks. The gameplay opportunities are huge and Nintendo know how to give us a digital playground. Plus you get dress Mario up in more than just his trusty dungarees. I want my poncho and sombrero wearing Mario and I want it now. Unfortunately I have to wait until October but even that’s slightly earlier than expected. This trailer was just full of goodness and lifted everything else around it. Nice job Nintendo.

E3: the PS4 Show

Sony’s conference has just finished, it’s 3:16 am and I’ve had loads of sugar. This blog may be nonsense. 

Holy fricking Spider-Man!!! That looked gorgeous and fluid, like a cross between the Batman titles and Uncharted which could be a blooming lovely combo. Swinging and quipping, that is definitely a Spider-Man game and I want it right now. 

Ok, calm down Joe… Let’s talk about the rest of the show. It’s a tricky one to describe. In many ways it was a lot better for me than the Xbox conference but then it also happened to be disappointing. Which it shouldn’t have been, as I literally blogged a few days ago how I predicted few surprises as they had a lot to show for what was already announced. That’s exactly what this was. It felt like part two of last year’s show, an update on the big surprises from then but lacking in any new reveals to get me excited. 

Last year they announced God of War, Days Gone and Spider-Man with all three getting extended looks this time. As noted above, Spidey was my favourite and easily the best showing of this e3 for me. God of War also looked epic. I was never in to the series and barely played any of them for more than an hour but this looked different. Brutal and lush, it’s definitely a technical showcase but I’m hoping it’s fun to play too. 

Days Gone looked ok but it didn’t offer anything new. More open world, more zombies. I feel like I’ve played it already. Uncharted Lost Legacy was a brilliant opener and after 4 thrilled me I’m all set for more. I’m letting that one off for lacking originality because its going to be faster paced and shorter and because I just like it, dammit. Let me contradict myself. Horizon DLC is another thing I’ll buy but I haven’t even finished the main game yet.

Surprises? Hmm... Monster Hunter World is technically a big one but I’ve never been a fan of that series. Still a good reveal of course, it’s a popular series and it’s returning to a non-Nintendo console. Being a Nintendo fan my first thought was about Nintendo losing a third party exclusive as opposed to the game itself (although I know there’s more to it, looks like two different Monster Hunter series?) Same thing happened when I saw Skyrim VR, that’ll take the wind out of the portable versions sails a bit. 

VR had a big section which is nice for VR owners. That doesn’t include me so I got bored here, but hey it’s doing well and Sony want to sell more. I shouldn’t really complain. Call of Duty and Destiny were other boring bits but again that says more about my tastes since I’m not interested in what will be the biggest two games still to come this year.

That feeling seems to be the main one here. This wasn’t a bad show at all, it just had a lot that wasn’t for me personally. At the same time it had games which are exactly what I want, big exclusive single player titles. I was unimpressed by Xbox because they had nothing like this but yet here I am being down on Sony for only showing like five exclusives I want and not announcing five more. I’ve just got greedy, but that’s their fault for putting on such a good show last year. This stuck to what I’ll be playing in the next 18 months and I should be pleased with that. A sensible E3 for a man who should have had more tea and less sugar.